RECAP

Let’s recap the birthday presents I received before we move on to one more surprise gift…

#10: L7 don’t have to “Pretend We’re Dead.”

#9. When The Cure’s music hits the airwaves on “Friday, I’m In Love.”

#8. The Charlatans’s biggest song in America was a “Weirdo” in the best way possible.

#7. Guns N’ Roses are “Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door.”

#6. Pearl Jam provided us with the best “Even Flow.”

#5. Sugar prevented me from feeling “Helpless.”

#4. When Nirvana sings about disillusionment, “Come As You Are.”

#3. U2 provided us with “One” more classic song.

#2. “Under The Bridge” is the still the place I love to hear Red Hot Chili Peppers music.

#1

Dear God, this project took forever.  

I thought the previous years I took on were hard.  But then I took on a year I thought I knew.  I mean, 1992 was the year of the grunge revolution.  1992 was the year British Indie kicked into high gear to fight the rising tides of grunge.  Right?

Of the 75 songs that made the Modern Rock year-end list that I projected, only 13 were songs I sufficiently knew before beginning preliminary listening all the way back in the Spring, eight whole months ago.  I only knew about 15 of the 75 songs on the Mainstream Rock list.  And thinking that 1992 represented my decade, I stupidly decided to balloon this project’s list of eligible songs to 170.  I thought I knew so much about this year just because I had been exposed to Revolver, Drop Nineteens, and The Auteurs.  What was I thinking?  After having to go through over 100 new songs I hadn’t heard from beginning to end before, I’ve already made a decision.  While I will keep this 75-75-50 policy in place for 1994 to 1999, when we really get into my golden age for music, I am not doing this many songs for 1990 or 1991.  I’m knocking down the list to 50-50-30, the same number I’ll go through when I do the 2000’s, when rock began to decline.  I’ll think about it with 1993, but I don’t expect it to be much different from this year.

And not only was it hard to narrow down what was the best and the worst of this year, what was so hard about this list in particular was I was discussing songs I had heard so many times in passing, that my mind just went blank when it came time to write about them.  What is there to say about “One,” a song that is universally loved?  Or “Under The Bridge?”  I just don’t know.

With “Smells Like Teen Spirit” and “Outshined” ineligible based on the guidelines for this list, choosing a number one became more difficult.  1992 had tons of legendary rock songs, but which one would I most want to hear a second time?  It was tough to say, especially considering the titans standing in the top four slots.  What’s better than “Come As You Are,” “One,” or “Under The Bridge?”

Full-on confession, as much as I enjoy writing these lists, I suck at reading comprehension.  It was my least favorite subject in school until programming came along in college.  Why should I need to know the type of shoes and soles John Doe is wearing in Chapter 15 of Mr. And Mrs. Smith?  And since I didn’t know it, I’m a bad student?  Screw this!  Well, in 7^th grade, after another reading comprehension test went poorly for me, my English teacher wrote for two of my incorrect answers, “Go with your first instinct.”  Whether by accident or by intention, this became a mantra for these lists.  Like my worst song of 1992, my number one song of 1992 was based on my first instinct.  

For some reason, this song just hit me differently.  More than “One” and “Under The Bridge,” this was the song that made an impression on me every time I heard it.  I just had a hunch this was going to be my number one.  The band that released my number one rock and alternative song of 1992 is largely known as one of the biggest number twos in history.  Well, it’s about time they had a number one in their resume.  

Welcome back, Pearl Jam.

“Jeremy” – Pearl Jam

Pop
#79 peak (August 19, 1995), 9 weeks on chart

Modern Rock
#5 peak (September 5, September 26, 1992)
#39 year-end, 11 weeks on chart

Mainstream Rock
#5 peak (October 17-24, 1992)
#38 year-end, 20 weeks on chart (15 in 1992)

UK
#15 peak (September 26, 1992), 4 weeks on chart

Death is a peculiar subject in music.  There have been great songs in music history about the ultimate finality, but largely about individuals in songs like “Ode To Billie Joe” or “Wake Me Up When September Ends,” the latter I may be discussing in full when I tackle 2005 next year.  But has any song ever made a more profound statement about death than “Jeremy,” the signature song by one of grunge’s big four?  I doubt it.  The song goes beyond the suicide of a Texas teenager and turns the song into an epic statement on how death means no going back.

Before we get into the main part of why this song is number one, let’s get into the music.  While it does not have the massive riff of “Smells Like Teen Spirit” or “Outshined,” does this song grab your attention musically?  Check.  An unlikely source, bassist Jeff Ament, takes care of that.  His ringing hammer-ons on the A string immediately grab your attention as the song starts, as it scales from A to the top string on his 12-string bass.  Those final two notes are instantly unique as they are echoed on the guitar, and instantly provide the warning that something tense is about to be discussed today.  Along with the bassline that stands out in the song, Dave Krusen puts in a strong drumming performance.  His snare is tight and keeps everything together.  But the music was not why this song was going to be the best rock song of the year.  It was always going to be because of the story.  The lyrics.

Eddie Vedder wrote the lyrics to “Jeremy” based on two different stories.  The main story is based on the song’s namesake, Jeremy Wade Delle.  For those unfamiliar with the story, Jeremy was a 15 year old teenager living in Richardson, Texas (near Dallas) who provided his English class the ultimate shock in January 1991, when he shot himself in front of the class.  Vedder decided to write the song because he wanted to provide Jeremy with importance, since his death was largely ignored by the wider public.  There is no direct implication in the song that Jeremy killed himself, and other than the “try to erase this from the blackboard” line in the bridge, there is little to suggest what happened other than the chorus:

Jeremy spoke in class today

I’ll get into the broader meaning of what Jeremy’s tragic tale means later on, but the second verse proves just as important in the context of the song.  The second verse focuses on Brian, a boy in Eddie Vedder’s school while growing up in San Diego.

And he hit me with a surprise left
My jaw left hurting
Dropped wide open
Just like the day
Oh, like the day I heard

Vedder admitted in a 1991 interview, before the band became famous, that he had gotten into fights with the student in fifth grade.  He uses this as a setup for his monstrous moment in junior high, when he did something arguably worse than Jeremy… he shot at his oceanography class while Vedder was walking in the halls.  Talk about your jaw dropping “wide open.”

What is the point of all this?  In a separate interview in 1993, Vedder discussed that while these events were very tragic, they went almost completely unnoticed outside of the schools they took place in.  He explained, “In the end, it does nothing… nothing changes.  The world goes on and you’re gone.  The best revenge is to live on and prove yourself.  Be stronger than those people.  And then you can come back.”  And that is the core value of “Jeremy.”  The will to live is far stronger than any sort of impact that killing yourself or attempting to take someone else’s life will do for you, or for society.

I believe that this is the reason why Vedder doesn’t reveal the final detail of Jeremy committing suicide, or his classmate shooting up a classroom.  By keeping the incident listed to one line, he highlights further how little his suicide mattered to the wider world, to the point that his obituary was reduced to a small paragraph in the newspaper.  The point is further highlighted in the powerful – and controversial – music video, which was censored in order to receive the heavy airplay it did on MTV.  Both the introduction and conclusion to the music video feature the notes, “3:30 in the afternoon” and “an affluent suburb.”  As sudden as it was, as tragic as it was… the loss of Jeremy did little impact in the way he likely intended.  With the exception of those who knew him, everything else stayed the same.

As with many entries on this list, I had writer’s block and struggled to come up with an idea of how to write this final entry.  When it finally became time to write why I believe “Jeremy” is the best song of the year, I’m pretty sure I wrote just two paragraphs in an hour my first night.  I finally watched the classic video in full, I listened to the song several times a night (which I try never to do) – anything to get inspiration.  Then late that first night, from the back of my memory banks, an unlikely source gave me material: Calvin And Hobbes.  In a Sunday strip in 1993, Calvin and Hobbes discover a dead bird in their home’s yard and reflect on what the bird’s death means to the wider world.

“Once it’s too late, you appreciate what a miracle life is.  You realize that nature is ruthless and our existence is very fragile, temporary, and precious.  But to go on with your daily affairs, you can’t really think about that, which is probably why everyone takes the world for granted and why we act so thoughtlessly.  It’s very confusing.  I suppose it will all make sense when we grow up.”

–       Calvin and Hobbes, September 19, 1993

When I recalled this strip, and I read the comic for the first time in years, my brain screamed, “OH MY GOD!”  Because, in a way, this Sunday strip is “Jeremy,” only toned down to appeal to a wider, less age-restricted audience.  It tied everything together for me.

No one outside of his school and family appreciated Jeremy’s life for what it was until well after he killed himself.  By the time “Jeremy” became a hit, it had been over a year since his death.  By making the decision to kill himself, Jeremy hadn’t realized how precious his life was, and this song made sure that we wouldn’t be able to entirely appreciate the miracle of his fifteen years, since we never really got to know him.  And it is true, we never really stop to think of this.  I don’t, and unfortunately, Jeremy really didn’t.  It is often said by those who greatly oppose suicide, “it’s selfish to kill yourself.”  I think this is a bit harsh, since as the tragic suicides of Chris Cornell and Chester Bennington in 2017 prove, we don’t truly understand what people are suffering from until it’s too late.  But, if anything, Jeremy’s suicide was a thoughtless act, as the Calvin And Hobbes Sunday strip implies.  He had his whole life to make his story a success, and to overcome his adversity.  With one pull of his trigger, he failed, and he never got his chance back.  

As the pre-chorus references, an awful home life and ignorant parents isn’t an excuse to kill yourself, and neither is bullying, as Vedder claims he did to Brian in the second verse.  On the subject of bullying, I will say this.  The best way to punish them is not to take away your own life, but to remove those people from your life and understand that you are a better person when they are not around.  I’m not going to get into details about my experiences with bullying because I want those involved in the past to be able to move on and live their own lives, but the point is made.  We become stronger people by overcoming adversity, and finding a way to prove we are bigger than those who thought we were small.  The true tragedy of “Jeremy” is not that the people in the classroom had to experience it.  It was that Jeremy – and by extension Brian – never got this lesson.

All this provides far more substance and power to “Jeremy” than virtually every song of the year.  But what truly takes it over the top is Vedder’s vocal performance.  Eddie Vedder has often been mocked, probably because his voice was copied over, and over, and over.  First by Scott Weiland, then Daniel Johns, then most notoriously Scott Stapp.  But on “Jeremy,” Vedder proved he had the range that few of those singers could match.  His vocals are just constantly emphasizing the behind-the-scenes conflict when he sings “DADDY didn’t give attention!”  And then when he hits that final high note after the chorus, with his surprisingly soulful “spoken!” backing vocals in the background, it becomes clear.  While Jeremy’s suicide sadly proved to be just another teen suicide in the grand scheme of the world, Pearl Jam didn’t just create another rock single.  They made their masterpiece.

I referenced in my introduction to this entry that Pearl Jam ended up as one of the biggest number twos in music history, behind Nirvana.  Pearl Jam’s Ten came out a month before Nevermind in August 1991, and while it eventually went diamond and has become known as one of the best alternative rock albums of the decade, it had the misfortune of going up against quite possibly the greatest alternative music album of all time.  When Kurt Cobain committed suicide in 1994 and Nirvana subsequently disbanded, Pearl Jam had a chance to take over their throne.  But by staying true to their morals in the music world, Pearl Jam instead ended up suing Ticketmaster, refused to make music videos for many of their singles, and were forced to weather the vacuum caused by Cobain’s death in which alternative rock turned from a grunge-dominated landscape to a garden of forking paths where post-grunge, Britpop, pop punk, ska, and electronica were all competing for attention.  All this led to Pearl Jam failing to sustain their meteoric early success, even as they remained one of the biggest names in rock music.

But for one moment in 1992, they were on top.  With the most meaningful song and one powerful bass riff, Pearl Jam had cemented their place not just as one of the biggest names in music, but as rock music legends on the same level with their more esteemed idols such as Led Zeppelin and The Who.  I may have had qualms with two legendary songs being disqualified, but naming “Jeremy” as the best song of the year based on the 170 songs available doesn’t sound like a compromise, it sounds appropriate.  “Jeremy” by Pearl Jam is the song that proved my birth year didn’t suck.

BEST LIST NOMINEES

The nominees for the best song of the year were…

“Walking On Broken Glass” – Annie Lennox
“Weirdo” – The Charlatans
“Teen Angst (What The World Needs Now)” – Cracker
“Friday I’m In Love” – The Cure
“Heavy Fuel” – Dire Straits
“Breath Of Life” – Erasure
“Midlife Crisis” – Faith No More
“I Can’t Dance” – Genesis
“Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door” – Guns N’ Roses
“November Rain” – Guns N’ Roses
“America: What Time Is Love?” – The KLF
“Pretend We’re Dead” – L7
“For Love” – Lush
“Tangled In The Web” – Lynch Mob
“Girlfriend” – Matthew Sweet
“Tomorrow” – Morrissey
“Come As You Are” – Nirvana
“It’s A Fine Day” – Opus III
“Alive” – Pearl Jam
“Even Flow” – Pearl Jam
“Jeremy” – Pearl Jam
“Movin’ On Up” – Primal Scream
“Everybody In The Place” – The Prodigy
“Under The Bridge” – Red Hot Chili Peppers
“Drive” – R.E.M.
“Nearly Lost You” – Screaming Trees
“Ebeneezer Goode” – The Shamen
“LSI (Love Sex Intelligence)” – The Shame
“Bad Luck” – Social Distortion
“Somebody To Shove” – Soul Asylum
“Little Miss Can’t Be Wrong” – Spin Doctors
“Helpless” – Sugar
“Star Sign” – Teenage Fanclub
“Hunger Strike” – Temple Of The Dog
“These Are Days” – 10,000 Maniacs
“Song And Emotion” – Tesla
“Life Is A Highway” – Tom Cochrane
“Even Better Than The Real Thing” – U2
“Mysterious Ways” – U2
“One” – U2

SOURCES

Miller, Bobbi, and Annette Nevins. “Richardson Teen-Ager Kills Himself in Front Of Classmates.” The Dallas Morning News 9 January 1991. Web. 5 September 2022 http://www.fivehorizons.com/songs/aug99/jeremy_article.shtml.

Brownlee, Clint. “Still Alive.” Seattle Sound Magazine March 2009. Print. 5 September 2022. Information gathered from Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeremy_(song).

Vedder, Eddie. “Interview With David Sadoff.” KLOL FM 20 March 2006. Web. 5 September 2022 https://web.archive.org/web/20060320182755/http://www.sonymusic.com/artists/PearlJam/echoes/echoes2.html.

Vedder, Eddie. “Rockline Interview.” KISW-FM 18 October 1993. Web. 5 September 2022 http://www.fivehorizons.com/archive/articles/rockline.shtml.

Watterson, Bill. Calvin And Hobbes. Kansas City: Andrews McMeel Publishing, 19 September 1993. Comic. 5 September 1993.

IMAGE SOURCES

The images from the “Jeremy” music video are taken from Medium and Q101, respectively.

Single cover from Spin

Image from Calvin And Hobbes from Pinterest

Photo of Pearl Jam from Rolling Stone