In his Worst of 2019 video, His Holiness Todd In The Shadows declared, “In 2018, we basically booed Imagine Dragons off the stage.” All I can say to that is, grass is green, the sky is blue, and Todd In The Shadows got a prediction wrong because Imagine Dragons were back with two more hits in 2021.

As I hinted last year on my 2020 worst list, I am not a fan of Imagine Dragons. Thus, I was less than thrilled when I saw them accumulate two more hits on the Alternative charts this year, knowing that I would have to listen to the band that brought us “Believer” and “Thunder” again. My reason for hating this band’s music is simple: On their biggest hits, there is no effort. There is no passion for their music. There are no memorable instrumental parts and the lyrics are all inspiration cliches. And nowhere was that more apparent than on “Believer” and “Thunder,” the TWO BIGGEST ROCK SONGS OF THE LAST DECADE. I can’t think of a better way to tell people how much better rock music was in the 90’s than it was in the last decade by comparing the decade-defining songs. In the 90’s, it was Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit,” one of the greatest songs of all time. In the 2000’s, the biggest rock song was Nickelback’s “How You Remind Me,” a song that isn’t amazing, but a song even their critics have to admit is better than most in its vein. But for the 2010’s, it was a song that was a 2/10, at best, with a first-month guitar part with no presence and loud percussive sound effects to hide how little went into the song. When I go to sporting events, “Believer” has become a staple song. As a teenager on the school basketball team, I got so annoyed when teams repeatedly came out to “‘Till I Collapse” by Eminem, a song that fails to get me pumped up to play my hardest. But I now owe that song an apology, because it has been jettisoned for a song that brings to mind a player who is jogging back on defense after committing a turnover. Yet “Believer” is not my least favorite Imagine Dragons hit. That would be “Natural,” from the following album cycle. While “Believer” and “Thunder” offered little, “Natural” has absolutely nothing. No notable instrumental parts. An extremely generic hook. No notable lyrics. The song downgraded from a player jogging back on defense to a player walking on the court.

And it didn’t look good for Imagine Dragons when their double A-sided single “Follow You”/”Cutthroat” came out in March. “Cutthroat” was quickly trashed by fans and critics, with many calling it the worst thing they had ever released. I hastily listened to “Cutthroat” before writing this entry, and yeah… it’s bad. It has a weird stop-start groove that quickly grates on the listener. This is not how you make a song called “Cutthroat.” This is how you do it…

But anyways, “Follow You” became one of five songs that utterly dominated the year in Alternative music, finishing third on the year-end list. I will say this… it is a little better than “Believer” and “Natural” with less obnoxious hooks and an attempt at actual meaning, but still something that felt boring and bland overall.

Then later this year, they released “Wrecked,” their other and more intriguing hit this year. This song had all the elements of finishing off this much-hated band. Another chorus of Dan Reynolds wailing, this time about how terrible everything was because someone was gone. Oh no, I thought. Now instead of being boring, they’ve resorted to whining and complaining. But then I looked at the song as a whole and realized… this isn’t horrible. In fact, this is the best single they’ve put out in years. And the reason is simple… THEY PUT IN EFFORT!

(Celebratory music plays)

They did it. When I first heard the song, particularly its instrumental, I almost fell down. A song where they sound less like a collection of sounds and more like a real band, with Wayne Sermon’s guitar having presence on the chorus and even him getting a short solo! And the lyrics made more sense to me when I found out they are actually about Dan Reynolds’s sister dying in the interim between Origins and Mercury – Part I. I can’t say this is a song that is great, but I can finally say Imagine Dragons are headed in the right direction. “Wrecked” offered potential. Even “Cutthroat,” while it was bad, was more weird and experimental in how bad it was, meaning there was an idea behind the song to make it work. In 2021, Imagine Dragons ran back on defense. I used to mockingly think about Imagine Dragons, “Call me up in 2029 when we start going the Nickelback route and start re-evaluating these guys as better than their rock-bottom reputation.” Maybe we are heading to a point where we can, legitimately, re-evaluate their material somewhere down the road.

But that means… one of the biggest punching bags in Alternative music is no longer a target. Who will I turn to for my worst list material? Imagine Dragons are no longer a shoo-in for the worst list. Let’s go over the obvious suspects. I’ve already gone over Five Finger Death Punch. Theory Of A Deadman didn’t have a hit this year. There is no way I will see Psycho Synner or Emmure on the charts unless they undergo a big makeover soon. Who to put on the worst list? Who…

Oh yeah, these guys. Oh, no. UUUUUUGGGGGHHHHHHHH…

“Way Less Sad” – AJR

Pop
#54 peak

Alternative
#2 peak (July 3-10, 2021)
#5 year-end, 35 weeks on chart

Say what you want about Imagine Dragons. Considering the massive success they’ve gotten from three terrible singles, they kinda deserve it. But they are finally proving they have a reason to continue releasing singles and albums by focusing less on fake inspiration and more on personal turmoil and musical experiments. In the world of Alternative music, and possibly all of music, I can’t think of a band whose existence in the spotlight is more pointless than AJR.

When I wrote about AJR’s “Bang!” last year, which of course made the worst list, at the same Silver Medal slot they occupy today, I wrote, “In a year where Alternative acts showed a noticeable improvement in their songwriting and passion for their music while other bands took risks breaking away from their standard sounds, AJR put out the same old stuff.” Well, another year passed, and nothing changed. The thing that irritates me the most about AJR constantly being rewarded for subpar music is not their obnoxious hooks or their terrible lyrics or even their ear-destroying sound effects. It is that every year, they release the same old thing. And the music industry and the American public keep falling for it.

The thing I can say about other bands known for being bad is that, as much as I dislike them, they at least have something positive I can say about them. Take a look at the bands I went over today. The Foo Fighters and The Offspring have tons of great singles between the two of them. You can skip the songs I went over today and proceed directly to their 90’s and 2000’s back catalogs. Three Days Grace and Papa Roach have released some songs I enjoy, specifically “Animal I Have Become” for the former and “She Loves Me Not” for the latter. Machine Gun Kelly’s latest charting song was his best so far, so maybe he’ll figure this whole rock music thing out. I’ve heard good things about A Day To Remember’s previous material, at least better than whatever “Everything We Need” was. And even Five Finger Death Punch… there are several earlier songs I unironically like by them, particularly “Far From Home” and “Hard To See.” It was several albums within their career when they went completely off the rails. But with AJR… I can’t name a single song by them that I like. I’ve listened to all their hits. Didn’t like a single one of them. I’ve listened to The Click front to back. Didn’t find a song I rate higher than a 5/10. Heck, you know “Sober Up,” their breakthrough hit and one of their most-mocked songs, complete with the line “my favorite color is you?” Well, that is, by far, the best thing I’ve heard from them so far. It was the only single I’ve heard from them that sounded musically cohesive, and its bad parts were more nitpicky on my end than their other material. Heck, the worst part of the song was Rivers Cuomo of all people, who sang the “my favorite color is you” line and presumably came up with it. Other than that, it’s a complete washout. Oh, and speaking of Rivers Cuomo, you know Weezer had another of the five biggest songs of the year in Alternative music with “All My Favorite Songs,” right? It was a good song! The orchestra and mellotron added a new dimension to Weezer’s classic sound. Well, there is a second version of the song featuring AJR. I gave it a chance… and yet again AJR screwed it up by ripping out the orchestration and replacing it with drum programming and synths. Everything this band touches turns into crap.

Because of their continuing success, I exhibited genuine fear last year while discussing “Bang!” that these Manhattan musicians would cross over to the mainstream at some point soon. And then we got to the next year, and instead of “Bang!” going away, it… AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

AJR is no longer just one of the biggest Alternative acts today. They are now in the mainstream. God better give me an explanation as to why “100 Bad Days” and “Burn The House Down” were big hits while great Alternative bands like the Greenberry Woods and Kerbdog got absolutely nothing.

Well, after trying and failing to sing about growing up last year, this year AJR are here to sing to us about being optimistic. Oh, this is a dangerous idea. AJR has been accused by many reviewers of promoting fake positivity in their songs, and their concerns are validated on “Way Less Sad.” The mindset of the song, according to the brothers, is that “things aren’t back to normal yet but we should be celebrating the small wins, even if they seem trivial.” That would be fine… if the song actually discussed being positive. Because I am not getting any positive vibes from this song.

I should move ’cause New York is gettin’ muddy out
There’s L.A. but it’s always kinda sunny out
And I don’t wanna hurt no more
So I set my bar real low

The first two lines are really not positive at all. It’s having a negative mindset about two very different places for a very small reason. If that were my mindset, I would move five billion times over the next five years, because every place I have ever lived at will be muddy at some point when the snow melts, the deserts of the southwest are dry but are also “always kinda sunny out.” Maybe AJR was using this to set up a “new mindset,” but seriously? The weather is making you so upset you are going to move away? Wow. Oh, and the strategy to overcome said adversity is to set their bar low. I though the strategy to being more optimistic is to… have a good time?

I’m a-okay, I’m a-okay
You say it but you just don’t mean it
You’re so insane, you’re so insane
Shut up and just enjoy this feelin’

And here we have our pre-chorus, which really sounds quite negative. Telling someone they are not meaning what they are saying, when there is no evidence that the person they are talking to is upset. All we found out about this person is that they are “a-okay.” Also, if you’re telling someone to “shut up,” you are not being positive. You are just being selfish. Additionally in the chorus, you say that even though you are “way less sad,” you also add that you are not “happy yet.” Which means you are telling this person to enjoy the fact that they are not happy. What kind of positivity training is this?

I wake up and I’m not so mad at Twitter now
Livin’ sucks but it’s suckin’ just a little now

Again. You are saying that even though you are supposedly much more positive and optimistic, your life sucks. Which means you are not really being positive. You need to do things to turn your life around, not just say, “I’m way less sad.” Maybe make new friends or try new things? Nope, it’s just the same old message telling people to just be “less sad.”

And yet again, this is what frustrates me so much about this band! Fake positivity is not new in AJR songs, whether it’s saying “I’m weak, and what’s wrong with that?” on “Weak,” or taking solace in having constant bad days just because it will make you “interesting at parties” on “100 Bad Days.” I get that we need to try to overcome adversity and try to take ourselves less seriously (which sucks for me, because I’m autistic and I take everything at face value), but seriously AJR, these are not things to celebrate! It’s not worth celebrating being unable to stand up for yourself, and it’s not worth celebrating playing up your constant misfortune for light-hearted laughs! And neither is having a mindset that takes pride in still not being happy about how life is going and trying to force others to adopt a similar mindset.

Knowing how AJR’s discography sounds, let me guess. This song’s going to be built on production that relies heavily on fake instruments, keyboards, and sound effects rather than real instruments and tight musicianship. And oh look, I was right. Wow. The horns on the song become grating quickly, the percussion relies heavily on trap beats and percussive sound effects, and other than the keyboard riff, nothing on this song sounds natural. The “hey hey hey!” backing vocals by AJR sound way too peppy for my liking as well, and the song’s main “don’t you love it, don’t you love it” hook starts on an eighth measure with hardly any syncopation, making it sound awkward and stilted. And of course, Jack Met’s voice gets auto-tuned during the bridge. Even though he sings the second part without needing it. Because why not use Autotune when you don’t need it. Finally, the song ends with an awkward effect where the song’s main keyboard riff transforms into a trumpet, which could be considered cool… only to transform again into that irritating high pitched voice you hear on almost every AJR single. GODDDDD!!!!!

Part of me thinks I’m being too hard on AJR, but then I realize, they are a band that releases terrible song after terrible song and are constantly being rewarded for it. And while I do try to listen to their songs with an open mind, not only are their songs bad, they get worse and worse each time I spin them. For a band that sings about positivity, not only are they bad at spreading the message, they unintentionally make it way more frustrating for the listener. AJR is a worst list mainstay for a reason, and with the band more popular than ever, it looks like I’m going to have to prepare to put these guys on a bunch of future worst lists. And I do not take pride in that. As hard as it is compared to writing about worst list stuff, I want to discuss songs I want others to hear, not songs that do not deserve attention.

COMING UP NEXT: The nightmare you’ve all been waiting for… the worst song of 2021.

SOURCES

Nathanson, Todd. “The Top Ten Worst Hit Songs of 2019 (Pt. 2). YouTube 22 December 2019. Web. 2 January 2022 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x5HSLDqtwAo.

IMAGE SOURCES

Sepultura Roots album art from Wikimedia

Imagine Dragons photo from USA Today

AJR photo from The List

Screenshot of the Billboard Year-End List from Wikipedia